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Pinestep stood in front of a couple of warriors, giving out orders for the evening patrol. "Try hunting a bit beyond the pines." The large tom selected the head of the patrol and watched as the cats headed out of camp and turned away as the brush swallowed the cats. Flicking his tail the tom padded away from the camp entrance and weaved around a pair of whispering, love-sick warriors. Blinking in the orange sunlight, he headed for the fresh-kill pile, deciding that he might as well eat and get rest before he went out on the moonhigh patrol later that day. As he approached the small mound of lifeless creatures, he couldn't help but shift his gaze towards the nursery where Ashcloud would be sheltering.

Something was telling the tom to bring the queen a piece of fresh-kill yet again today. Flicking an ear he retrieved a rather plump magpie from the pile, poor bird had strayed into their territory, but it would feel the bellies of hungry cats. He chose the magpie for Ashcloud and retrieved two mice for himself before carrying the prey towards the nursery. The tom stood at the entrance before dropping the fresh-kill on the earth. "I hope I'm welcome." He meowed before gathering the prey again before heading into the nursery and dropping the fresh kill near where Ashcloud usually nested.

Pinestep didn't care if the clan had their suspicions about his constant delivery of prey to the nursery, it was none of their business. The main problem about being a clan cat was that if someone knew your business, there was no way you could escape their whispers and wandering eyes. Alas, Pinestep was lucky, he didn't care about another cat's opinion of him ( except maybe for Ashcloud's and Froststar's). He pawed the vole towards the nest and looked to the queen.

"Why don't you come outside the nursery?" With me. He suggested quietly, wondering what the she-cat would say. Pinestep had had alot of time to think about which path he wanted to follow in life, the dark side, or the path of truths. For some reason he found some sort of comfort in the presence of Ashcloud, which made him want to lean towards the latter, truth.

Pinestep felt strange now standing in the nursery, its scents drowned with that of kits. "If not, then that's alright. Just an offer." He meowed quickly before grabbing his mice in his mouth and heading out of the nursery before waiting for her answer. The deputy felt the eyes of another clan cat watching him as he padded towards a couple of shrubs and lowered himself onto his paws. Most cats knew well enough that the tom didn't want to be bothered, and that the only way to get into his presence was either work-related, or he invited you, which was pretty dang rare.

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She lay curled in her nest, half-asleep. Lightkit and Ternkit crawled over her, one settled on her back the other pounced on her tail. She flicked it obligingly, the sounds of laughter and giggles lulling her to sleep. A light shaft of sun hit her back, sending warmth through her. She would have moved, to a full patch of sun, but she rarely left the Nursery. The idea of being out, on display in the light, for all to see, turned her stomach. She knew the stares, the questions, the pity. And so she stayed curled in the Nursery, where she truly belonged. She popped open an eye as Ternkit snuggled against her belly, curling up against her and yawning. The little tom blinked too-large eyes up at her, a sleepy smile on his lips. “Will Pine come and visit today with more friends?” His eyes were undeniably hopeful. Ashcloud bit her lip, purring and nuzzling Ternkit. In truth, she never knew when the massive tabby tom would appear. Though in recent days, it had seemed to grow increasingly frequent. He brought her prey, some of it heavy with his own scent – his own hard-earned catches. And Ternkit rejoiced in his presence, in the fuzzy friends to bat about the Nursery.

As if on cue, she heard Ternkit squeak – “He’s here!” In the same instant, his scent flooded her nose. She remembered how, weeks ago, it had caused her fur to prickle, unease to race up her spine. Now, well now she wasn’t sure. It didn’t warm her, like the scent of the kittens that were her love and charge. Yet a part of her yearned for it, to figure out what he wanted from her. She lifted her head, looking to him. Ternkit was already eyeing the vole he had pushed over. The little tom wriggled from her grasp, pouncing on the piece of prey and purring happily. She dipped her head to him, replying quietly. “You’re always welcome.” She blinked, her ears flicking back. His offer was tantalizing. Behind him, she could see patches of sunlight, begging for her presence. Yet out there were also the stares of the curious, which she wished so desperately to hide from. A moment later, Pinestep had turned – his long tail vanishing through the Nursery. Ashcloud waited a moment, indecision weighing on her.

She hauled herself carefully to her paws. Lightkit and Ternkit stared up at her, but all she did was smile and speak softly – “Come loves, we’ll go outside and play in the sun.” The kittens squealed in approval, racing towards the entrance. Ashcloud bent, plucking the Vole in her lips. She hobbled her way outside, keeping her head high. Ternkit and Lightkit bounded behind her. She spotted Pinestep almost immediately. She moved towards him carefully, settling down an appropriate distance from him. She sighed as she eased the weight off of her paws. Her tail flicked. She sent Pinestep an apologetic glance, indicating the kittens with her chin. “I hope they won’t disturb you.”

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Teeth had already begun to tear into one of the mice when Ashcloud had exited the nursery and into the clearing. Pinestep swiped his tongue over his muzzle as he heard the she-cat's voice, automatically rising into a sitting position. "They're fine." He meowed as he cast a glance in the direction of the playful kits. Pinestep was fully aware that the kits belonged to Froststar, and that she had asked of the Shadowclan queen to care for them, seeing that it was in her best interest to tend to her duties as a leader first and foremost.

"So you decided to join me after all?" The tom smiled slightly, an expression that was few and far in between for the feline. He was used to the stares from his clanmates, and he had grown not to care what other cats thought about him. They thought he was anti-social, ill-tempered, and too strict for the company of other cats. Thing was, Pinestep had a wide bubble, he didn't want too many cats crowded his personal space, save for a select few. He'd do his rightful duties as the clan deputy, such as organizing patrols, and doing whatever Froststar asked of him that day.

He lowered himself back on his paws before chewing into his mouse once more. Ever since he had been conversing with Ashcloud over the last few weeks, his dreams had been peaceful. He wouldn't admit to this, but some of his dreams had even been filled with Ashcloud. Her scent and soft, gray fur drew him in like honey bees to a field of flowers. The she-cat had a very likable nature, and her disability didn't draw Pinestep away or make him want to pity her. She was just as special as any cat, and when Pinestep saw that she was actually trying to make the best of herself despite the obstacles set in front of her, it made him see the term weakness in a completely different color.

The world wasn't all black and white. Ashcloud was a tenacious young cat and still tried to make herself useful to the clan, even if that was by taking care of the next generation of warriors. Finishing off one of the mice, he raised his head. "I will admit Ashcloud, you are an amazing she-cat." The tom meowed quietly so that no other nosy cat would be trying to listen in on his conversation and get things the wrong way. "You've made me see cats in a completely different way, and that weakness can easily be turned into a strength." Blinking his eyes, he turned his attention back on his mouse and focused on finishing his meal.

Raising back up into a sitting position, the tom began to groom his tabby fur. "I'm assuming you and the kits have been well?" He asked between licks as he brushed down the bits of fur that had begun to go haywire. "Have you gone outside of camp lately?" The tom asked after he had finished grooming his fur, his attention now fully on Ashcloud. "The offer is still open for me to help you train a bit." Strangely enough, Pinestep desperately wished that the she-cat would be able to run on just three legs. It wouldn't be perfect, but the queen would feel somewhat like a full fledged clan cat again.

Pinestep didn't want Ashcloud to live out the rest of her life in the nursery or, starclan forbid, the elder's den with the nag Brindlestorm. The old she-cat even caused Pinestep to keep his distance. "It's a beautiful day, as you can see." He looked up towards the clear sky that was only dotted with a few white clouds. Wrapping his tail around his paws, he sat and waited on the she-cat's decision.

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Once she’d dreamed she’d walked forever. It had been a simple place, simple and peaceful and yet horrifyingly constrictive. Her paws had passed over the earth, her bare toes leaving imprints in the dirt. She remembered the feeling of the leaves, of reaching branches that caressed her shoulders and legs. She’d never once looked to the side, never once ducked her head under a branch, or pushed one aside with her nose. She’d just walked. She had stared straight ahead, driven by some mechanical power. Even as leaves scraped her face, left trails of dew and traces of wilderness on her cheeks. She had walked. She’d had a sense of time, specifically that it was passing more quickly than she could understand. Each time she had tried to grasp an instant, to pull herself into a present moment – it had faded away. The sun rose and set in minutes, darkness passed in seconds, and a new day began. Yet she couldn’t cry. She couldn’t run or call out or scream. Her face was blank. It was only a place, far in the recesses of her mind, that registered the fear, the questions. The rest of her was consumed with walking, with breathing, with the rhythmic surge of mud between her toes.

She found herself remembering that dream now, as she sat face to face with Pinestep. At the time, she’d wanted nothing more than to escape – to break free from her endless path. But now, there was something idealistic about it. Perhaps, someday, she would take Pinestep, gesture for him to follow. And the two would walk, away forever to a new place. Yet where they were going, where they found themselves, would never matter. She could stare straight ahead, vanish into that mechanical consumed place. And perhaps, figments of importance such as her paw would cease to exist. She would walk through the pain, the hobbling imperfection. And it would stop her no more than the branches and leaves. The twinging pain of touch would be but one of thousands of passing caresses, feeble efforts to block her path. She had dreamed of it, at times. Though her natural element was calm, gentle and sweet – she’d always had a certain admiration for mists. It couldn’t be grasped, or controlled. It was the true meaning of powerlessness – to realize the constrained limits of one’s own abilities. It was in weakness, in the realization of feeble reaches, that true fear festered.

Pinestep’s quiet voice brought her from these thoughts. She smiled, half eating her vole – half watching the kittens as they tumbled in the sun. She couldn’t look at Pinestep. There was something in his voice, admiration, something serious. Heat rose to her cheeks. She wasn’t used to such flattery, to confidence or the look in his eyes. She didn’t know how to respond, what to do. So she ate in silence, her ears flicking shyly. Ashcloud cleared her throat, nodding slightly. “They are growing well, and will make strong warriors.” It was an easy, generic answer. Yet her voice was cautious. She didn’t know how to operate this new unfamiliar territory she and Pinestep had crossed into. She shook her head, “I’ve had my hands full in camp,” she paused, looking longingly towards the trees outside the camp, the call of the spring birds, “though I’d be lying if I said I didn’t dream of it.” She paused, gulping down another bite of meat. The food stuck in her stomach, roiling nervously. She lowered her voice, her eyes on her paws demurely. “I would enjoy going out of camp, with you.” There was something about him that made her brave – or at least had made her brave once. And she yearned for that bravery again.

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One day, Ternkit and Lightkit would be warriors within Shadowclan, and who knows, one of them may even grow up with the ambition and drive to become clan leader. Pinestep admired Ternkit's curiosity and playfulness, but once he became apprentice, the young cat would have to abandon that nature and strive to learn and protect his clan. In due time. Pinestep thought as he turned his gaze away from the kittens.

In a way, Ashcloud denied his offer of helping her and though he didn't show it, he was a bit disappointed. Fortunately, the she-cat agreed to venture outside of camp. "Good, everyone needs a break every now and then." With his belly full, and feeling well rested, the tom was eager to walk through the forest. He had always called the marsh his home, and never would he leave it. Sure, it wasn't as marvelous as the picture perfect woods of Thunderclan, as soothing as the shores of Riverclan, nor as wide and expansive as the moors of Windclan. However, the marsh held its own grotesque beauty. Pinestep didn't mind walking through the dark forests, chasing after rats and frogs.

The hoot of an owl in the night was sometimes enough to lull an uneasy mind to sleep. So when the marsh called, Pinestep would answer and he would stay loyal to his home above all the clans. "Who will watch the kits while you are gone?" He asked as he got to his paws, his green eyes were holding a hidden emotion there, affection? Looking towards the nursery, Pinestep realized that he vaguely remembered his time spent there as a kit, aside from the tragedy that he had caused there.

Shaking his head, the tom meowed "I'll be waiting just outside camp." Turning, he padded across the clearing, silently glad that he was caught up with his duties for the morning. Now I have time to spend with her. Feeling his heart skip a beat, the tom pushed the thought to the back of his mind, not wanting to think such things.

Little did the tom know was that ever since he had been interacting with Ashcloud, he had slowly been changing for the better. When he was around the she-cat, his voice was gentle and thoughts of ruling the clans, and power were locked away, nearly forgotten. The truth was, Ashcloud, whether she knew it or not, could make or break the Shadowclan deputy. From when he had first dropped prey off for the queen, he had been doing it to win the favor of his clanmates. Although when he had began to converse with the she-cat, he began to prize the fire in her heart, her determination and will power. Pinestep loved to hear the she-cat's voice, and soon enough he was visiting her nearly every other day.

As he stepped outside of the camp entrance, he found himself listening to the birds in the trees, even their songs indicated that today was very much indeed, a beautiful day. After waiting for the she-cat, he began to pad down the lightly beaten trail out of camp. Do you have any particularly favorite spot outside of camp?" He meowed curiously, wondering if the she-cat had a distinct tree, or sunny patch that she had often visited when she had been able.

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She wasn’t really sure what to expect. As well as she knew Pinestep, from watching through the Nursery, he was still a mystery to her. She didn’t understand him. And in all honesty, she had never really attempted to. She found no reason to. She was generally happiest alone, or with the kittens. And the certain knowledge that he was stronger, far more intimidating than her, well she had a healthy respect for him. She was a gentle, quiet soul. She’d never challenge him, or anyone for that matter. And thus far she’d seen no reason to test their boundaries. Especially since those boundaries were only now being tentatively established. She pursed her lips slightly, watching him. She lifted her gaze to him with some hint of surprise at his words. She had expected him to suggest some time, some distant day in which they could spend time together. And a part of her had expected that day never to come. These were, after all, polite pleasantries – were they not? They were social rules and norms. Many had offered to share tongues some time, to spend a day with her in the sun. But plans were never made. They were largely empty words, but it mattered little to her.

She finished off her vole, swiping her tongue around her lips. The meal sat pleasantly in her stomach, yet a reminder of what she herself was unable to do. Her ears flicked at his question. In all honesty, she hadn’t considered who would watch the kittens. She hadn’t imagined she would truly be leaving them. She paused, looking to where Lightkit and Ternkit tumbled around and around. “I- I hadn’t considered.” There were other queens of course, others whom she could ask to watch the kittens. She bit her lip, unsure of exactly how to proceed. How would Froststar feel about her wanderings, about her essential abandonment of the leader’s children? She barely had time to reconsider, Pinestep was on his paws, padding towards the entrance – waiting for her to join him. Her heart skipped a beat. A large part of her wanted to seize the opportunity, butterflies fluttering in her quiet stomach. Another part of her doubted – cautioned that inevitably she would be hurt – reminded of her own crippled limitations. But somewhere, between doubt and insecurity, a decision was made. She stood, balancing on her three good paws. She called the kittens to her.

She ushered them back into the Nursery. Another queen – Gorsebelly – smiled kindly at her. Gorsebelly had always shown her a gentle sort of kindness. And the other queen had been watching, had observed Ashcloud and Pinestep. Without a word, Gorsebelly called the kittens over, ushering them in with her own. She sent a wink Ashcloud’s way. Not a single word was exchanged. Ashcloud smiled gratefully to Gorsebelly, reminding herself to find some particularly soft moss for the other queen. And with that she turned, approaching the camp entrance with apprehension in her belly. She hobbled, but she was efficient. In a few moments she had joined Pinestep. She smiled at him and nodded. “The swamps,” Her eyes glittered, remembering times long-gone, “As a young warrior I used to site in the branches of the pines, hanging over the swamps, listening the the frogs hop about.” But it had been moons, a year really, since she’d had dreams of climbing a tree.

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The swamps? Pinestep hadn't been to the swamps ever since he had been an apprentice himself. The place was boggy, and the mud seemed to sink in between a cat's paws. Yet, as with most of the places within the territory, it held a strange tranquility. "The swamp it is then." He meowed as he walked, allowing his fur to lightly brush against the gray warrior.

All of his worries had evaporated from his mind as he walked with the she-cat, for once in his life, he was at peace. He yearned for the she-cat's presence, it made him feel as if he wasn't alone anymore. Sure, he had the company of his brother, Cedarstorm, but that didn't exactly feel the gaping hole in his heart. Swallowing his pride, he meowed suddenly, "So, you never took a mate?" He was genuinely curious as he began to pad towards the sound of croaking frogs.

The foul little green beasts were quite ugly, yet they would ease a starving cat's belly. Soon enough, a frog tread across his paws before hopping off into the nearby brush. "Strange little beasts." He meowed as he pushed through the growth of the forest before finally coming upon the swamp, just as boggy and uninviting as ever. Flicking his tail he looked toward the dirty waters. "Here we are, the swamps." The tom almost purred as he looked at the she-cat and moved to a small tree with low hanging branches.

Glimpsing at Ashcloud's paw, he realized that the young cat wouldn't be able to climb a tree again. A cat needed all paws to be able to grab a pawhold on the bark of a tree, and that simply was not going to happen for the gray cat. "Here, one can be away from the judgement of other cats. From the questioning stares, the curiosity." He meowed as he laid down on the ground, his eyes looking out towards the swamp.

Another frog hopped across the mud, unaware that his predators were merely a few tail lengths away from him. "I need to talk to you about something, and I promise I don't have any more secrets." He meowed without looking to the she-cat. Pinestep silently wondered what kind of marine creatures lived beneath the surface of the swamp water. Perhaps some types of fish that could be of benefit to the clan, the tom would have to make sure to check that out before they left for camp.

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She moved with her usual lopsided gait, yet there was a rhythmic evenness to it. She didn’t hurry, didn’t trip over her paws in an attempt to keep up with Pinestep. He moved at an easy pace, relaxed. She half-wondered if he’d done it on purpose, slowed himself so as to allow her to keep pace. Usually, the thought irked her. The pity of others only increased her shame and self-consciousness. But this time, without the word or worried looks, it was something else. It seemed…sweeter. She noticed the light brush of his fur against hers. Her skin tickled and tingled when he moved away. She hadn’t been in such close proximity to anyone, but her foster kittens, in moons. She wasn’t sure how to behave, what to say.

The question surprised her. The emotion flitted across her features, albeit briefly. She paused for a moment, thinking on her words. Many of the warriors her age had settled down, found someone to curl up with at nights. As for Ashcloud, well things were different. She shook her head softly. “I was crippled young. I barely truly had the opportunity to know my fellow warriors before I moved into the Nursery.” She shrugged lightly. Her interactions were restricted. Yet she was no longer bitter about it, as she once had been. She knew love, the love of her sister – of the other queens, of the scampering kittens. And that was enough.

As they neared the swamp, a slow apprehensive sort of smile spread over Ashcloud’s lips. It was a child-like wonder, an absolute joy. The smell of it, the feeling of the mire between her toes. She laughed lightly, the first time she’d made the sound in Pinestep’s presence. Her eyes crinkled in amusement as she watched the frogs. “I love their sense of entitlement.” She laughed again, watching the awkwardly fat creatures hop along their way. And perhaps in a way she identified with their awkward gaits. After all, who was she to judge the movement of others, even of prey? Ashcloud moved, against the trees, rubbing her fur against the bark. Her eyes fluttered closed.

For the moment, it was enough to simply imagine climbing their heights, of laying draped over the swamp. She returned to Pinestep, lowering herself to the ground near him. She curled up, tilting her head back so her chin pointed towards the sky. A light purr rumbled in her throat, full of the perfection of a moment’s contentedness. Her ears perked, though she didn’t open her eyes. “And what might you need to talk to me about?”

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It was a shame that no tom had knocked Ashcloud off her paws, due to her unfortunate accident. Pinestep, despite his hidden monstrous nature, looked past the mangled paw and saw that the she-cat was a complex, interesting beast. "You've captured my heart, Ashcloud." He meowed, not entirely sure how to put thoughts concerning affection into words. Ashcloud was slowly taming the beast, little by little. Although Pinestep still didn't give a mouse's tail about any other cat, he was beginning to care for Ashcloud.

Perhaps the cat reminded him of the sister he had lost, or maybe she had filled in some ancient locked away emotion that the tom had tried to keep hidden. Focusing on the bog, he tried to act like whatever reaction or words that the she-cat had to throw at him wouldn't matter. However, that mask he wore couldn't hide all things, no matter how much of a lifeless statue he tried to make himself out to be. "I never really realized it until a couple of days ago." Pinestep had only half wondered what led his paws to bring prey to Ashcloud nearly every day, sometimes he even specifically went out to hunt just for the queen.

He couldn't bring himself to look at the cat, he knew that Ashcloud was straight forward with her words, he remembered clearly what the she-cat had said when he had asked what she thought of him as deputy. Yet if she rejected him, it wouldn't matter to him, or so he figured. He would just go on about his life and focus on more important things. "But you are..important to me.." The tom meowed quietly, not realizing that his thoughts had passed through his lips.

Blinking his green eyes the tom flicked his tail, feeling uneasy. He was allowing himself to be read like an open book, he didn't like that at all. He felt as if he was being cut open, all of insides being free for the world to see. The tom remained speechless, unable to convey any of his thoughts into words.

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The sun was warm on her face. Like a caress, it spread tendrils of heat through her body – heat and contentment. She had tucked her ruined paw beneath her comfortably. It had not pained her that day, nor in many previously. She could still hear the croaking, the splashed hops as the frogs and toads went about their business. Many of the other clans turned their noses up at the scent of the bog. They whispered among themselves of crowfrood and rats. Yet she herself couldn’t imagine a life eating fish, or hares, or one away from the marshy wetlands she called home.

Her ears perked. A sudden quiet tension had overtaken the peaceful place she had so longed to visit. She could almost feel the words, waiting on the edge of Pinestep’s tongue. But what he said, what came next, she could never have predicted. Her muscles tensed. Her eyes flew open, but she couldn’t look at Pinestep. She found herself simply staring ahead, at nothing and everything. Through one eye, a whole new life stretched before her – a life of companionship, of kittens grown in her own womb. Yet in the other was a fear, a fear of the unknown, an unpreparedness.

…you’ve captured my heart…important to me…Ashcloud…

He had fallen silent, and still she couldn’t speak a word. She could see, from her peripheral vision, that he sat facing the bog. He didn’t dare look her in the eye. A part of her fought, denied. She couldn’t believe that he, who had once appeared so cold and callous, could feel such tenderness for her. And the other part of her was perplexed. She was a shy creature, suited to a life of independence. Yet slowly, almost uncontrollably, she found herself standing. It took her quite some time, with the added shock, to balance on her three paws. She hobbled, a single step at a time. Pinestep grew closer, his scent stronger, his words louder in her ears. She reached him, where she could feel the static between them. She lowered herself again painstakingly to the ground. She curled back in on herself, pressed tight against Pinestep. She tentatively lowered her head, rested it on his massive tabby forepaws. Her voice was quiet, shook. “Right now, this is all I can give you.” Because for the moment, it was all she had.

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Green eyes shifted as he felt fur brush against his pelt. It had been too long since he had felt the warmth of another cat. The last feeling of true warmth was when he had nestled with his brother and sister into their mother's belly as kits. As the she-cat rested her head on his paws, the tom gently licked her ear. "Don't worry, its all I need." He meowed as he began to feel a purr rising in his throat.

Happiness. It was such a foreign emotion to Pinestep that it almost scared the large tom. The swamp seemed to be all that much more symbolic to the tom, it had now become more than just a patch of mud, and clumsy amphibians. To Pinestep, it had become a place of new beginnings. He had verbally announced his affection for another cat, a cripple no less. But Ashcloud was more than just a queen, she was special. Resting his chin lightly on the she-cat's head, the tom was at ease.

His mind went to Pebblekit once last time, but as he took in the gray queen's scent, he pushed the thought of his sister away. If it was not for the death of Pebblekit, would Pinestep have ever developed feelings for Ashcloud? Would he have been able to become as strong as he was today? Putting the lovely bones of Pebblekit to rest in the paws of Starclan, Pinestep was able to notice that the world around him was truly magnificent. "You're all that I'll ever need." He meowed softly again as he closed his eyes, letting his thoughts drift to the possibilities that were opening up in front of him now.

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You’re all that I’ll ever need.

The words rattled around in her brain. It was all she could do not to stiffen beside him. Those words, they were final, they were honest and genuine and deep. They were committal. She stared into the swamp. A shock was ebbing and flowing inside of her, numbing her. She couldn’t understand how they had come to this, what path she had turned down. She was nearing her thirtieth moon. She was young, though many younger than her had found love – even born kittens. This wasn’t what unsettled her. Rather it was the speed, her inability to predict just what Pinestep would do. He was a wild card, and in a way that made him dangerous.

One moment, he’d seemed to hold an aggressive authority-consumed disdain for her. She remembered his distinct discomfort, a gaze that lingered on her twisted paw. His scorn for her, his sharp words upon finding her in the pines that one afternoon so long ago. Where had that creature gone? Even if he hadn’t been a particularly pleasant companion, he’d been consistent. Ashcloud had understood him – been able to predict what would come next, in most cases. But this Pinestep, this creature at her side, who “needed” her, who possibly loved her – she didn’t understand.

She didn’t understand where he had come from, how they had reached this turning point. She’d long since given up hope of a romantic life. And yet here, when it wandered into her paws, she questioned it. She was reluctant to accept what she most wanted, and what she had steeled herself to accept. What was even worse, was as his words – his committal, his promise – beat in her mind, she realized she couldn’t say them back. Not yet. She couldn’t be what he wanted, what he needed. The words slipped from her lips, before she could stop them. “How can you say that?” It wasn’t accusing, broken or suspicious. It was simple shock, a searching desperation. She needed to understand – understand where it had begun, when it all had changed.

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